Muffin Bottoms [not] Just another WordPress weblog

05/21/2011

Tweets from the edge on Judgement Day.

Filed under: Humor,Mundane Or Sublime,Pop Culture — admin @ 9:19 am

A Hunter S. Thompsonian look at the newest end times.

“It just hasn’t gotten weird enough for me.”

1. Hold still, I see you have a little bit of Rapture on your chin, I’ll get that…

2. Any good Judgement Day requires a good soundtrack. Might I suggesthttp://www.reverbnation.com/marcofrucht

3. I wonder if maybe the rapture already happened and none of us know it.about 3 hours ago via web

o Delete

4. @MKEIMC FLASH – The world ended 4 hours ago in Nairobi. Please make a note of it.http://tinyurl.com/TheTheTheThatsAllFolks RTabout 15 hours ago via web in reply to MKEIMC

o

5. @DanteRoss After the Rapture I’ll put on my best Donald Trump face, father a love-child or two like Ahnold, and then say, “Winning!9:21 AM May 20th via web in reply to DanteRoss

o

6. @MarcFrucht Uh oh, Christian Heavy Metal Band Stryper hasn’t listed any tour dates for the rest of May…8:45 AM May 20th via web in reply to MarcFrucht

o

7. Some Hopi Elders say there’s little worry if you’ve been “good,” it’s more like Spring coming! http://www.tinyurl.com/springtocome8:14 PM May 19th via web

OK, Aukland, Sydney, Melbourne and the Chathams Islands are all reporting that it’s tomorrow and everything is just fine. But it’s still 5pm in Minsk and Istanbul so keep an eye out.

Wait, what if the Zombie Apocalypse happens at the same exact time as the Rapture? I’ll be so confused.

Calgon stock is way up because of their slogan “Take Me Away!”

It’s 530pm in Tehran, we’ll know something soon.

So kids all over the country are refusing to clean their rooms now, because “rapture so who cares?”

FLASH – The world has been ending in Prague now for three hours. Please make a note of it.

FLASH – The world ended 4 hours ago in Nairobi. Please make a note of it.

Oh no. Watch this. Now I’m worried.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_penLnDqIlE&feature=related

You mean we all get judged tomorrow? I sure hope Simon Phillip Cowell’s not going to be there; that old-washed-up-never-has-been.

/Lenny Bruce is not afraid…/

Who wants to go shopping? I hear there’s going to be really good sales after the rapture. And wait, isn’t it already Saturday in Japan for the past couple hours? Hmm…

Lord, please assure me we’re not all going to go like in a Rebecca Black song! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CD2LRROpph0

Wait, I have a question is the Rapture going to be like New Years Rockin’ Eve where it happens first in Japan and then works its way to New Years Rockin’ Rapture, and then a few hours later hits Hollywood? That’s it, I’m heading to Hawaii…

Uh oh, Christian Heavy Metal Band Stryper doesn’t list any tour dates for the rest of May!

http://www.stryper.com/

Some Hopi Elders say there’s less to worry about than you think, you know. It’s not your nightmare version of “end of the world,” at all. If you’ve been “good,” it’s more like Spring coming!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mBPghmuV8SY

Oh man, wouldn’t that be funny if it was a typo and some stupid “expert” went and told everyone there’s going to be a rapture when really it was only going to be a big ol’ California Condor or something? LOL

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10150195372931697&set=a.17303071696.8622.505636696&type=1&theater

05/17/2011

My Quahog (Is Hoggin’ The Beach:) Lyrics to a song I should publish soon!

Filed under: Academic,Food,Humor,Mundane Or Sublime,Music and Stuff — admin @ 8:26 am

Lyrics to My Quahog (Is Hoggin’ The Beach)

by marco capelli frucht

Not copyrighted yet, so please (don’t) steal…

My quahog is hoggin the beach…

He’s eaten up every and each

He eats all the snails and inhales the quails

And even the sandcastles shovels and pails

My quahog is hoggin the beach

My quahog has eaten the trees

The bushes and all of the bees

The birds in the air and the crabs in your hair

And even the dogs are now empty of fleas

My quahog is hoggin the beach

My Quahog has eaten the shops

The ones witgh the moms and the pops

He didn’t stop there he bought walmart fair share

Even firmed up the rights to the breathable air

My quahog is hoggin the beach

[SPOKEN] This song in case you couldn’t tell is called

“My quahog is hoggin the beach”

My quahog has ate up the land

He never even needed a hand

All the farms and the shores and the 5 and dime stores

With quarries and worries and slurries and hurries

So listen to my story you must understand

[SHOUTED] BEFORE IT’S TOO LATE AND HE EATS ALL THE SAND!

My quahog is hoggin the beach

My quahog is now after you

He’s willing to start with your shoe

Next is your ankle and both of your knees

But after your soul will no longer be free

I hear he’s got eyes on a child or two

My quahog is hoggin the beach

[SPOKEN] I have a question for you: would you rather be chowder or stew

This is my quarrel with clams

They multiply faster than yams

They consume and consume

Until then they presume

And take flight for your room

Eating all your perfume

[SPOKEN] Like a Quahog will do: You know how they are

When he chases your shoe and consumes it like stew

As soon as he reaches the coast with the beaches

For any and eaches.

My quahog is hoggin, the…

beeeeeeeeeeeeach.

2 good places to hear this song are:

http://www.reverbnation.com/artist/song_details/8376861

or:

http://soundcloud.com/atizine/my-quahog-is-hoggin-the-beach

And a good place to watch a homemade music video I did of it is:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gn8TKn4tv1U

05/04/2011

METACOMET’S HEAD ON A STICK IN A PLIMOTH PARK FOR 20 YEARS: Roots Of Our Racism.

Filed under: Academic,Mundane Or Sublime,News — admin @ 6:23 am

The blood lust of so many of my “countrymen” (and women) this week over news of Osama Bin Laden’s death frightens me greatly as a human being but also as an army signal corps veteran.

There should be somber reflection and subdued “joy” regarding Osama Bin Laden’s demise.

There should be a search for closure and catharsis throughout the land perhaps, and especially among those who lost loved ones but there should not be all this demonstrative applause and neo-patriotic joy. A real Warrior prays for and seeks peace only killing as a last resort and necessary “evil.”

All this armchair warrior behavior gives me great pain. Not to mention I find it rude because come on now! It shows very bad form.

A songwriter friend of mine named Spook Handy puts it this way:

WORSE, HOWEVER, IS THAT HE BROUGHT OUT THE WORST IN SO MANY AMERICANS. PEOPLE I KNOW, FRIENDS AND EVEN RELATIVES, ALLOWED THEIR DARKEST DEMONS TO RULE THEIR RATIONALE AND EMOTIONS – COLLECTIVELY PRETENDING THAT WE DIDN’T KNOW WE WERE WRONG TO TEAR APART IRAQ, TORTURE PRISONERS AND DISREGARD THE SPIRIT OF BOTH THE AMERICAN CONSTITUTION AND GENEVA CONVENTION.

http://www.facebook.com/notes/spook-handy/thoughts-on-osama-bin-laden/10150560528145654

My friend Lucy put it this way:

IT RATHER BOTHERS ME THAT ONE OF THE SEALS COMMUNICATED TO HIS SUPERIORS THAT ‘GERONIMO’ (OSAMA BIN LADEN) HAD BEEN KILLED IN ACTION.

GERONIMO WAS A GREAT NATIVE HERO. WHAT AN INSULT — OF THE GREATEST MAGNITUDE!

WHY WASN’T THE CODE NAME COLUMBUS, HITLER, STALIN, CUSTER, JACKSON, OR SADDAM USED ?????

Shepard Smith and Christiane Amanpour are both very excited about this new path that the United States is

taking now that Seal 6 team took Bin Laden and four other peoples’ lives away two days ago. If you follow their careers with any kind of discerning eye you will see they do not go anywhere that they can’t make low millions of dollars and high hundreds of thousands of dollars exploiting death, war and conflict. Falluja, Palestine, Tokyo, Britain, New Orleans or a vote count in Florida or Ohio. Doesn’t matter. If there’s conflict, if there are people grieving dead relatives, they will be there with their teleprompters and microphone. “How does it feel, Mrs. Metacom, to see your dead husband’s skull rotting on a pike at the gates to your neighbor’s village?” “This just in, we have a 9 year old grieving his dead dad, Metacom junior, please speak clearly into the microphone, your dad is dead, you are in shackles, they are beating your mother nearly to death and tonight they’ll be boating you down to Bermuda to be slaves, how are you feeling right now?”

And here’s some of what Rabbi Lerner has to say about all that:

The task of spiritual progressives at this moment is to reaffirm a different consciousness —

to remind ourselves that we are inextricably bound to each other and to everyone on the planet.

The struggle against terrorism will not be won through killing, no matter how many people

we assassinate. It will only be won when we in the West can show genuine love, caring,

and generosity toward everyone else on the planet.

http://www.tikkun.org/nextgen/tikkuns-spiritual-response-to-the-assassination-of-osama-bin-laden

Last word goes to my friend Rachel who asks this!

What does this say to our children?
Did you know Native Americans historically
serve in the United States Armed Forces
in higher numbers per capita than
any other ethnic group.


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